The 12 Steps to Grilling Nirvana

1. Burgers, hot dogs, steaks, ribs
2. Sauces, rubs
3. Chicken, fish, potatoes, corn
4. Ham steaks, liver, casseroles, pizza
5. Soups, stews, lobster, omelets
6. Tex-Mex, veggies, fruit
7. Smoking
8. Roasts, turkey, lamb
9. Game, exotic meats, Oriental
10. Breads, cakes, cupcakes, pies
11. Custards, popovers, gourmet entrées
12. Cookies, confections

These are the stages of Men at the Fire.
These are the phases to which we aspire.
By trial and error we face each in turn
To "Wow, that’s delicious" from "How did that burn?"
We eat our mistakes, whether charred or not done
And brag to each other, saying isn’t this fun
But sooner or later, mistakes number fewer
As we gain expertise with spatula and skewer
And then it’s a contest to outdo ourselves
As we look for new goodies on grocery shelves
‘Till finally all of the frenzy has fled
And we see it’s how she got * us * cooking instead.

(an original verse by Marty Winston)